I have been there, I have been in those shoes. It started out with me just popping pills, because I thought as long as I had a prescription for them it was ok. Then, it lead to smoking weed. Those around me got me to believe, it's just weed- everybody could use some to relax. In reality, it just numbed my heartache. I thought it made me happy because I would laugh even smile. Instead it made me paranoid, sleepy, and guilt flooded not only my brain but my heart also.
I had been accused of using those hard drugs before, but I wasn't- at that time. It wasn't til I was in my deepest darkest depression that I said," well hell I'm already the family's biggest disappointment." I had heard and knew of what some drugs did to others. I was looking for something to pep me up so I could keep up with the boys and still manage to get my house clean. One of the things I regret more than my disease of addiction is turning to the bitch she is called "Crystal".
I was so miserable. I was lost in a maze of fog and saw no light to guide me my way, nor a hand to hold because I was afraid to turn around and see what I have to face.