How to keep going

It feels as though I am the only one hurting. As many wake up, refreshed, and begin their day. But me.... I feel as though I am back where I started with little sleep, trying to make sense of my pain, my heart aching, and catching myself wandering throughout my days. Losing things and wondering all day where I could have misplaced it, but knowing I lost you too soon.... God, I wasn't ready.
They say time will heal this broken heart, but I can't make that out. I feel as though I should have called you that night, prayed for you one extra time, told you I loved you a lot more, hugged you more often, and wondering did I do enough? From the outside I might seem ok, but on the inside I'm a mess. So at these times when I need you the most, I ask God to help me. Show me where you want me. As my friend flies high, help me put my pieces back together. Show me that I CAN fight this battle. Carry me through this time, for I need you more than ever. Tears still flow down my face, but help me hold my head up. You're my only way through this life.
Help me realize life here on earth is only temporary. I will see my friend again, we will carry on and dance, and experience the beauty of heaven together.
Just missing my friend.
Love,
Mary Beth